What Beca Needed to Hear
by Ashton09
Summary: Beca comes back to apologize before Nationals, but where did the push to apologize come from? Insert for "You Make us Better". Marked as Aubrey/Chloe/Beca to show up, but Aubrey and Chloe are at rehearsal while the story is going on.


A guest reviewer pointed out that Beca coming back to apologize came a little out of left field, and I realized that I had this scene in my head the whole time I was writing "You Make us Better", but never mentioned it and didn't write it. So here it is, hopefully giving the needed backstory for Beca returning to apologize.

* * *

Beca isn't sure how she's gotten to this point in her life.

She'd meant to turn her back on Chloe and Aubrey, to go back to her dark clothing and avoidance of all things colorful. She'd meant what she said to both of them, but she's finding it harder to forget them than she'd realized it would be. She'd thought forgetting them would be as simple as ignoring colors had been when they'd first appeared, more a matter of stubborn determination than anything else. Turns out it's not that simple.

Every shade of blue reminds her of Chloe's eyes, every shade of green of Aubrey's. Going outside on sunny days is emotional torture, the strong greens of the plants framed by the soft blue of the sky surround her in all directions, not letting her forget the empty spaces left in her life. The gentle breeze tugs at her, seeming to push her along the way Chloe would, or push against her the way Aubrey had. To Beca's surprise, she misses both.

She'd gone to Jesse for help a few days after Semis, but his idea of helping was telling her that she's being an idiot and to go apologize. Beca is still insistent that she's not to blame here, so rather than responding she leaves the room without a word. She's pretty sure it adds another name to the list of people who hate her, because Jesse won't answer her texts or calls anymore.

Which is how Beca ended up with no one to go to but her father, after weeks of trying to get over the other two. She's not even sure why she's here, what she wants to ask him. She's spent most of the year avoiding him, only occasionally giving in to Chloe's prodding to spend time with him for lunch or something equally noncommittal.

They sit in silence for a long few minutes, Beca not sure where to start, and her father seeming to still be a little shocked that she's here. When the awkward silence stretches on too long, Beca finally turns to face him where he's leaning against the counter across the room, gathering her thoughts in an attempt to get through the conversation ahead in a relatively coherent manner.

"Why did you leave mom?" she finally asks, for once not sounding like she's trying to start an argument.

"I was a coward" he says, to her surprise, moving to sit next to her at the island. "I let my pride get the best of me, couldn't admit that I was wrong, so I walked away. And by the time I realized what I'd done, I was with Sheila, and we were happy. It's a different love than what I had with your mother, but still love. And as much as you might hate me for saying this, my mistakes with your mother let me succeed in this relationship."

She does still hate him a little bit, but it's not like she's a shining example of how to make things work with a soulmate. And she's a little surprised that he's sharing this with her, that they're having a civil conversation about this of all things. Still, she has years of hurt built up, and can't hold back the comment at that last statement. "So glad they helped with the step-monster, since they don't seem to have helped with me" she says, not bothering to tone down the bite in her voice.

He winces at the words, and Beca relents a little, not wanting to start an argument when she's come to him for help. "Would you change it?" she asks instead, letting the bite fade from her voice as she does, getting back to the reason she's here.

"Honestly, I don't know" he sighs. "I'm happy with Sheila, and I don't know that I'd want to give that up. But I also know I made some major mistakes with your mother, and if it weren't for Sheila then yes, I'd change what I did." He shifts closer to her at the island, and for once she lets him, rather than pulling away like she usually would. "I'm not sure why you're asking me all this now, Beca, but I want you to know that I missed you, and I'm sorry for how I've treated you since then. I guess I haven't learned from my mistakes as well as I thought I had."

It's the first time he's apologized to her, and Beca finds that it helps more than she'd thought it would. Not enough to erase the hurt from years of neglect and criticism, but enough to give her the reassurance she needs to open up, telling him the whole story as he listens.

"What do I do, Dad?" she asks when she finishes, surprised at how emotional she's feeling after the story, and more surprised when she doesn't push away the reassuring hand he lays on her arm.

"You make some hard decisions, Beca" he answers softly. "I didn't try hard enough to keep your mother, and I didn't let myself admit that I'd been wrong. I didn't give us a chance to work through it, I just walked away, and even if I'm happy now, I still regret that fact. So are they worth the effort to you?"

She doesn't answer, just stares down at her phone where the last message from Chloe is still pulled up when she unlocks it, staring up at her in silent accusation. She might not be to blame for everything that's happened, but she's the one who ran, and she _had_ messed with the set.

Maybe she does owe them an apology, she thinks as she gathers her things, heading to the rehearsal space after saying a quick goodbye to her father. She's not sure what will happen after that, but at least she'll have tried.


End file.
